liquid diet day 2 - 10/15

Today was better than yesterday.  I made a few small tweaks and I think they really helped. 

I took out the strawberries from my morning shake in order to give me more calories to have during the day.  So my breakfast and lunch shakes were 1 cup soymilk and 2 scoops soy protein powder.  My evening shake was 1 1/2 cups soymilk and 2 scoops protein.  I also sprinkled a little sugar-free vanilla pudding into the shake to make it thicker, and (hopefully) more filling.  It seemed to do the trick, since I only had to have 1 cup chicken broth and 1 cup of tea to keep me full between shakes.  Unfortunately, my mood still took a nosedive around 3pm and I ended up being very cranky till bedtime.  I don't like the person who comes out after 3pm, but I have to keep telling myself it's only temporary.

I am missing FLAVOR very badly and I cheated and had 2 jolly ranchers today.  It was worth it!  I wish I could get jolly ranchers in other flavors too.  Perhaps cheddar & sour cream potato chips?  I wish...

2 days down, 12 more to go! 

liquid diet day 1 - 10/14

Today was rough.  The nutritionist I was working with had me eating 3 meals plus 2 snacks a day.  My stomach was used to never being very empty.  I had my morning shake in the morning like usual, around 6:30 (1 cup soymilk, 2 scoops Total Soy protein powder, and 1/2 cup of strawberries).  When I got to work, I had my daily cup of half caff coffee with a little amaretto creamer.  By 10am I was HUNGRY.  I had a cup of chicken broth made from bullion, and that lasted me until 11.  So I had a cup of tea.  It was a struggle to wait till noon to have lunch.  The lunch shake consisted of 1 cup soymilk and 2 scoops protein powder.  It didn't do the trick, so I had some of the sugar free jello I had brought along.  The afternoon lasted FOREVER.  I had another cup of chicken broth and tons of water to keep the hunger pains away.  By the time I left work, I was in a mood.  That mood got worse when my kids weren't listening while getting ready for karate.  I listened to my stomach growl during the entire lesson and counted down the minutes til it was time for my dinner shake.  When we left karate, I warned the boys this cranky mommy was their new mommy since I was so hungry.  Luigi burst into tears.  To lighten the mood I told Luigi I was so hungry I was going to eat his fingers because they looked like delicious little sausages.  Mario was laughing hysterically, but it made Luigi cry even harder.  Poor guy was tired and too sensitive to deal with a cranky mom.  The evening got better after mama had her shake (another cup of soymilk and 2 scoops protein powder).

Hopefully the first day was the hardest and it gets easier from here.   

final hurrah and liquid diet

Since this was my weekend with my kids, I decided it was going to be a party weekend.  One final hurrah before going on my all-liquid diet for who knows how long.  For the first time in months, I had real food for breakfast - an English muffin instead of a shake.  For lunch the kids and I made a homemade pizza.  For dinner I bought a 1/2 sheet pizza.  Yes, pizza twice in a day.  But wait, it gets better.  Sunday, we went to a movie and the boys and I had popcorn and candy.  We came home for lunch, and finished off the rest of the pizza.  The kids went to a friend's house around dinnertime and they had pizza once again for dinner.  I declined, because even I have limits.  After having pizza four meals in the weekend, the kids and I made cupcakes.  We each had 2.  Even though we all need to detox now, it was worth it.  It was a fun, carefree weekend and I have no regrets.  The kids and I have been on such a strict eating plan since we are all working with nutritionists.

Today it's back to the grind, food-wise.  At least for the kids - today begins my all-liquid diet which I have to  be on until my surgery date on October 28 (and beyond).  I am allowed to have 800 calories of protein shakes a day, and all the sugar free jello I can tolerate.  (I have a feeling I'll get sick of it pretty fast).  I add strawberries to my morning shake, but I have to have just soymilk & my protein powder for my other 2 shake meals since I don't have enough calories to add fruit.  After my binge-y weekend, I'm at 252.5.  I have to get down to 244 before my surgery date, but I'm not worried.  800 calories a day is nothing when you work full time, have to chase after the kiddos after work, and have a house to clean on top of it all.

Keep reading along if you want to know more about my journey.  I hope to be better at writing posts, including my weight loss, surgery, and meals.

Jumping through hoops

Since the initial appointments with the nurtitionist, psychologist, and surgeon, I've had to make many changes and jump through several hoops in order to qualify for the Roux n-y surgery.  I had to have 2 psychologist appointments before she would sign off on me.  I had to have weekly hour-long appointments in a group setting for binge eaters.  I also had to meet with a nutritionist for 3 months and lose a certain amount of weight before they would sign off on me.  Since I was practicing all their recommendations and was on the path of losing weight, they finally signed off.  The nutritionist was the last signature I needed before having my file submitted to my insurance company.

I had to wait about 2 weeks until I got the letter from my insurance company saying I was approved.  I was so happy!  After the letter, I had to wait several days for the Cleveland Clinic to receive the approval.  I got a call from my surgeon's nurse to set up my pre-surgery appointment as well as my surgery date.

It's  been a long road to get to this point, and the road to recovery after surgery is even longer, but it's worth it.  I am excited!

healthy changes!

I picked up some vanilla soy protein powder this weekend at the local big box store.  I had it for dinner with 1 cup of soymilk and 1/2 a frozen banana on Sunday night.  Of course, the strawberries were calling to me at 9:30pm, so I had a late night snack after my healthy shake dinner.  I won't call it a fail, but I wouldn't call it a win, either.  I had another shake this morning with a handful of frozen strawberries.  It actually kept me full till noon!  Maybe those nutritionists do know a thing or two after all...

I decided to start the Couch to 5k program today, the hottest day of the year so far.  But I couldn't go back on my promise to myself, especially since I am meeting with the surgeon on Wednesday and I want to be able to report good things to him.  I felt like I was in hell, the way the track was radiating heat upwards to my face.  I quit early, but I did more than I did yesterday (nothing), so I'm not going to be too hard on  myself.  I just need to remember the deodorant for Wednesday, ha!

Initial appointment(s)

The hospital where I had my initial Bariatric Surgery appointments is the Rolls Royce of hospitals.  It's also a huge medical campus and quite a freakin' maze.  I signed in and was set up at a computer, where I had to answer almost 350 T/F questions.  Then came the hour-long appointment with the psychologist.  She asked me about past attempts for weight loss, psychiatric history, support systems, etc.  I then had to run over to an adjoining building for an EKG, bloodwork, and chest X-rays. 

Then BACK to the original building for an hour-long appointment with the Nutritionist.  That appointment was absolutely not what I was expecting.  I thought they were going to have me go on a diet immediately, to help kick start the weight loss before the surgery.  Nope, it was all to prepare me on what my diet will consist of after the surgery.  They gave me tons of recommendations that I need to put into place now, so I am used to them after the surgery.  Since I'm a vegetarian, I need to increase the protein in my diet, and add a protein shake into the mix for breakfast.  I need to switch to decaf  (or herbal) tea and downgrade to half-caff coffee.  No more carbonated beverages.  There are more suggestions, but those are the ones I'm working on right now.  I told them I was going to start the C25K program and they set a goal for me to lose 20lbs by my appointment mid-September.  They admitted it's not really how much or little I lose, just that I maintain and not gain.  That's what the insurance company is looking for.  If I gain weight while being advised by a nutritionist, I won't be very compliant with my post-surgery diet, now will I?

I meet with the surgeon this coming Wednesday.  I have no idea what to expect at that appointment!

As of this initial appointment, I am officially 261.0 lbs according to the medical scale.

Busy living life - updates galore!

Holy guacamole, I can't believe it's been over a month since I've written anything!

There have been broken bones, several incidents of falling off the bed, and an ADHD diagnosis to boot! Kindergarten and preschool promotions, a job promotion, and tons of cavities. 

The biggest news is that I am now a single lady (holla!).  Or maybe it's Divorcee.  When I started this process, I was positive we'd never be able to settle anything on our own.  We couldn't get work together in the marriage, why would it start now?  The Ex lives in dreamland, so he was sure we'd come to a good settlement without outside help.  That is, as long as I agreed to everything he wanted.  If I did that, we'd still be married.  And homeless.  And living in Texas.  On the day of our final pretrial, we agreed to almost everything.  We just had to hammer out a few smaller details regarding the kids.  We always lived a materially separate life (not even mixing our CDs together), so the inatimate objects were a non-issue for us to divide.  But how do you divide people?  The day of the final hearing was a bit of a surprise.  I learned the night before - and was sworn to secrecy - that it wasn't really a hearing at all.  It was the court's last-ditch attempt to scare us into settling.  Since I knew I would have gotten a better deal (but spent loads more money) in a hearing, I wasn't really worried either way regarding a settlement.  Ex arrived to court (for the first time) wearing a suit.  So apparently he wasn't clued into the pretend-hearing from his lawyer.  Not surprising, since his lawyer knew that he was very likely not getting paid anything above the retainer.  It doesn't take long to get past Ex's facade and learn his modis operandi.  In the end, I am happy with what we settled on.  I believe Ex is ok with it too.  He's said a mopey comment or two about his visitation, but he agreed to it without ANY argument, so it's probably for pity.

Tomorrow is my big day of appointments, in preparation for Bariatric Surgery.  I can't wait!  It will be a long day, and I wish I had a friend to go with me for moral support, but I didn't even bother asking anyone, since it will be super boring for them.  I'll just bring a book, and wish I was better at knitting :)  I have been saying goodbye to all my favorite foods, one by one, over the past few months.  Surprisingly, I didn't gain a ton of weight doing so.  Maybe because I'm already big, and I didn't binge.  I only bought 1 bag of my favorite chips, one last favorite pizza, etc.  And of course I shared with my 3 favorite Littles.  I can't wait for this new, healthy life to start!